T3h Chr0n1cl3s 0f teh n4rn1a!

[Joker Boy]

[England Bombings]

House has been disconnected from the server.
House has been disconnected from the server.
Small child has been disconnected from the server.
House has been disconnected from the server.
House has been disconnected from the server.

Mother: “Quick foos! Into teh shelter!”
Edmund: “Sif I get faja!”
Peter: “No foo! Teh bombs will teh pwn u!
Mother: “OMG! No! Come bak 2 teh shelter!”
Peter: “Worry not! I will get him!”
**Peter chases Edmund into house.
**Bomb explodes as Edmund grabs picture of father.
Peter: “c’mon Ed! Sif lets move!”

[Later at Train Station]

Mother: “Lucy, listen to Susan or she will teh pwn u.”
Mother: “Edmund, listen to Peter or he will teh pwn u.”
Mother: “Peter, take care of ur siblings.”
Peter: “g2g! our train is here”

[at Professor’s house/mansion/palace]

Wife: “We got several rules here. Don’t touch teh artifacts.”
**Susan reaches out to touch a sculpture
Wife: “OMG NOOOOOOO!”
Peter: “PWNT!”

[hours later]

Lucy: “I’m teh bored. Lets play hide and seek.”
Peter: “okay…but I will teh pwn u!”
Edmund: “rofl.”
**all go and hide as Peter counts
**Edmund hides behind window right as Lucy gets there…pushes her out of way
Edmund: “N00b lol.”
**Lucy runs and hides in a spare room with the wardrobe in it.
**hides in wardrobe.

[in Narnia]
**meets Mr. Tumnus the fawn. Fawn is frightened terribly.
Lucy: “Omg wut is up with all these noobs l8ly?”
Tumnus: “Me? Noob? Wtf is a noob? How about u have tea with me?”
Lucy: “can’t. g2g.”
Tumnus: “pl0x?”
Lucy: “kk. Just for a bit.”

[in Mr. Tumnus’ cave]

Tumnus: “Would u like 2 hear sum music?”
Lucy: “yes pl0x!”
**Tumnus plays vigorously as Lucy falls asleep.
**Tumnus begins to cry because he is kidnapping her.
Lucy: “why the f*** r u crying?”
Tumnus: “cuz of something I’m doing.”
Lucy: “wtf r u doing?”
Tumnus: “Pking u.”

[outside professor’s house, playing cricket]

**Peter bowls ball and hits Edmund.
Edmund: “0mg u noob! If u do that again…”
Peter: “Sif I will pwn u newb!”
**Peter bowls ball and Edmund hits it…hard.
Edmund: “Teh p0wnz0rz!”
**Cricket ball flies through and breaks a window in professor’s home.
Peter: “lmao.”
Edmund: “RUN!”

[in Narnia]

**all hide in wardrobe.
**all end up in Narnia.
All: “WTF?!”
Lucy: “told u it was r34l!”
All: “WTF!?”
Lucy: “ph34r! teh wh1t3 w1tch!”

[part when teh wh1t3 w1tch is after teh group]

Wh1t3 W1tch: “1 4m t3h wh1t3 w1tch! 1 sp34k 0nly 1n t3h l33t!”
Lucy: “ph34r!”
Edmund: “I w4nt m0r3 Turkish delight!”
Wh1t3 W1tch: “N0 m0r3 turk1sh d3l1ght! U r teh g4yz0rz!”
Edmund: “****.”
Lucy: “WTF Edmund?! U dare join them? Their leet is taking u over! we must stop it!”
3 |) |\/| u |\| |): “AGGHHH!”
Lucy: “Aslan! W3 n33d teh Aslan!”
**Aslan arrives.
Aslan: “Grrrrrrr!”
**mighty roar. Wh1t3 W1tch flees and later they meet in camp.

[l8r in rogue camp]

**Wh1t3 W1tch is escorted down isle to Aslan.
Aslan: “The blood shall be repaid…in my blood. Not Edmund's."
W1t3 W1tch: “3v3n b3tt3r…”

[Stone Table sacrificing Aslan]

Minions: *chanting* “D34th 2 Aslan!”
Minions: *chanting* “D34th 2 Aslan!”
Aslan has logged on as Admin.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has reconnected.
Minion has been banned.

Susan: *watching scene* “0mg! 0mg! OMG! They r going to PK him!”
Lucy: “NOOOOOOOO!”
Aslan has logged out.

[next morning as Aslan is still dead]

Lucy: “maybe I can give him some mage juice to revive him.”
Susan: “Its 2 l8. They’ve already pked him.”
Lucy: “No fair! They’re using wall hax!”
Wh1t3 W1tch: *out of nowhere* “D34th 2 haxxorz!”
Wh1t3 W1tch has logged out.
Susan: “STFU.”

[l8r at major battle]

Peter: “I must lead them!”
Strange creature whose name I don’t know: “Yes! You must!”
**all charge into battle
Susan has logged on as Admin.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Susan has disconnected.
Minion has disconnected.
Susan has reconnected.
Minion has reconnected.
Minion has been banned.
Fawn has disconnected.

Peter: “omg! We’re pwning! We’re pking them! Hahah!”
Fawn: “here comes Aslan! Yay!”
Wh1t3 W1tch: “WTF?! Holy ****! F***! Dam!”
Wh1t3 W1tch has been temporarily banned for use of inappropriate language.
**Peter receives a pop-up notifying him of a new PM.
Peter: *reading PM* “From: Minion. To: Peter. ‘****! *** hole! Omg I will pwn ur ****ing ***!!111’
Minion’s PM system has been disabled.
Minion has been kicked from the battle field.

[afterwards]

**Peter, Susan, Edmond, and Lucy have all grown up to 20 years more of age.
Peter: “Hey Lu, u remember when we pwnt that w1tch?”
Edmond: “LOL.”
Lucy: “yeah, she was such a noob.”
Susan: “rofl.”
Peter: “I am quite the rofl waffle!”

**All exit wardrobe.

3nd!!111

 

[Joker Boy]

[At Bilbo's 111th Birthday]
Merry: "Omg, I pwn"
Pippin: "Sif, I pwn"
**Rocket goes off
Gandalf: "Pwned!"

Bilbo: "This = shiz, bai foos"
Bilbo has left the server
Frodo: "***!?"

[later, in Bag End]
Gandalf: "Give teh ringz0r to Frodo"
Bilbo: "Sif! It r precious!"
Gandalf: "STFU NOOB!!!"
Bilbo: "ok"
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Bilbo has been kicked from The Shire

**Later
Gandalf: "Show me teh ring, foo!"
**Gandalf rides out, does some research, comes back
Gandalf: "OMGZ, it R teh ring!"
Frodo: "***?"
Gandalf has logged on as admin
Frodo has been kicked from The Shire
Sam has been kicked from The Shire

[At Isengard]
Gandalf: "sup dawg, i r g4nd4lf da gr3y!"
Saruman: "Foo! U R teh noob!"
Gandalf: "***?!"
Saruman: "Sauron pwns joo!"
Gandalf: "Sif, I R leet"
**Sarumon beats the **** out of Gandalf
Saruman: "Pwned!"

[on the road to Bree]
Merry: "look foos, shrooms!"
Pippin: "Woot! Shrooms!"
Frodo: "Ph34r!"
Sam: "Shrooms!"
Frodo: "PH34R!1!1"
**black rider stops, sniffs, goes past
Frodo: "OMG, packetloss!"

[Bree, in the Inn of the Prancing Pony]
**Frodo is drinking and dancing on a table, then slips
Frodo has left the server
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "OMGz, dc'd"
Aragorn: "OMG, noobz"

[at Weathertop]
Merry: "Mmm, shrooms!"
**MERRY IS BROADCASTING HIS IP ADDRESS!!!
Frodo: "Foos! Ph34r teh haxorz"

**the black riders attack
Merry: "OMG!!!"
Sam: "O.M.G!!!11"
Pippin: "***"
Frodo has left the server
**head nazgul stabs Frodo's ghost
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "***... hax!"
**Aragorn lraps into the fray with a flaming brand
Aragorn: "PH34r!!!!!!"
Merry: "LOLOL flamed! "

[on the road to Rivendell]
Aragorn: "ZOMG!Arwen!"
**Arwen rides up
Aragorn: "A/S/L? Wanna net secks?"
Arwen: "Sif! *** is up with Frodo?"
Sam: "teh leet Hax0r "
Arwen: "Firewall?"

**Arwen rides off with Frodo, the nazgul give chase. Arwen crosses the ford at Rivendell.
Arwen: "PH34R!! My dad pwns urs!"
**nazgul start to cross
Arwen: "LOLOLOLO noobs!!1!"
**the ford rises up and washes the nazgul away
Warning: Connection Problems Detected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
nazgul has disconnected
Arwen: "Pwnt"

[at the Council of Elrond]
Gimli: "dwarves pwn!"
Legolas: "Sif, Elves pwn!"
Boromir: "OLOLOL noobs, men pwn!"
Elrond: "STFU tards!!1!"
**Frodo puts the ring on the plinth
Gimili: "Sif ring pwns all!"
**Gimli swings his axe at it, which shatters
Elrond: "**sigh, noob"

[Frodo meets up with Bilbo]
Bilbo: "OLOL, me = 10th level thief!"
Frodo: "OMG, u r teh pwn!"
Bilbo: "Do u still have teh ringz0r?"
**Frodo shows Bilbo the One Ring
Bilbo: "OMG u tard, I want to TK you!"
Frodo: "sif!"
Bilbo: "ph34r my mithril"

[The Fellowship leaves Rivendell]
**Gandalf leads the fellowship through the mountains
Legolas: "ZOMG, leet gfx!"
Gimli: "I R dropping frames! FFS"
**There's an avalanche which threatens to knock them off the shelf
Gimli: "Gandalf, teh draw distance is too far!1!!1"
Gandalf: "**Sigh. Moria?"
Gimli votes to change map to Moria
Votes 4 of 4 required
Legolas: "lolol Gimli, time to upgrade!"

[The fellowship approaches the gates of Moria]
Gandalf: "FFS, its too hard! Anyone got a walkthrough?"
**The gates of Mordor open, but the Guardian attacks!
Frodo: "OMG! ph34r!"
Boromir: "GL HF"
Aragorn [broadsword] guardian
Legolas [arrow] guardian
Gandalf: "gg"

[The fellowship enters the mines of Moria]
Gimli: "OMG!!!! PWNED!"

**After travelling some time in the dark the Fellowship come to a chamber with a large well
Gandalf: "teh bookz0r has some clues!"
**Merry knocks a skeleton in armour down the well
Gandalf: "OMG! noob!"
Merry: "d'oh"
**The fellowship hears the ork drums
Boromir: "***?"
Aragorn: "***?"
Frodo: "..."
Gandalf: "Oh ffs >.<"
**the fellowhip shores up the doors as the orks come
Boromir: "TEAMS FFS!"
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Aragorn [broadsword] ork
Boromir [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
ork: "OMG! h4x!"
Gimli: "pwned"!
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas: "lol!!"
Boromir [broadsword] ork
Gimli [axe] ork
Gimli: "Foos!"
Legolas [arrow] ork
ork: "ffs, wallhax!"
**The cavetroll enters the chambers destroying the doors
Gandalf: "Oh ffs!"
Boromir: "Omg, its teh boss!"
Aragorn: "Sif noob, we're not at teh end yet!"
**Cavetroll slams Boromir and Aragorn out of the way, and then skewers Frodo
Sam: "OMG!"
Gandalf: "OMG!"
Aragorn: "omg, pwn!"
**Legolas jumps on the cavetroll and shoots arrows down into its head
Legolas [arrow] cavetroll
Ork: "OMG! PWNED!"
Gimli: "LOLOOLOL! noobs"
**The fellowship then runs through Moria, chased the whole way by a horde of orks
Boromir: "FFS! Teams, foos!"
**A flaming shadow starts to follow them, and the orks withdraw
Aragorn: "Now THIS is teh boss!"
Gandalf: "OMG!"
**The fellowship take to long flights of stairs that are starting to crumble and fall. Orks shoot at them with arrows.
Legolas: "LOL, noobs. Chex0r this out!1!"
Legolas [arrow] ork
Legolas [arrow] ork
ork: "AIMBOT!"
ork: "turn it off!"
Legolas: "lolol!"
**The fellowship crosses a bridge, Gandalf stops to confront the balrog
Gandalf: "joo shall not pass!"
Balrog: "***?"
Gandalf: "JOO SHALL NOT PASS!"
Balrog: "Sif, noob"
**Gandalf strikes the bridge with his staff, cracking it and causing it to break under the Balrog's weight
Balrog: "ZOMG! PWNED!"
Frodo: "OMG! Gandalf!"
**The Balrog falls and in a last act of defiance strikes out with its whip, entangling Gandalf
Gandalf: "D'oh"
Frodo: "OMG, joo foo!"
Gandalf: "fly u foos, fly!"
**Gandalf lets go and follows the Balrog into the crevass
Gandalf has left the server
Balrog has disconnected

[After escaping Moria the fellowship finds itself in Loth Lorien]
**The fellowship rests, and in the night Frodo speaks with Galadriel
Galadriel: "For a noob, u r teh leet!"
Frodo: "Sif. I don't want teh ringz0r. Do u want teh ringz0r?"
Galadriel: "******! SIF I want teh ringz0r. I have enough h4x of my own!1"

[The fellowship leaves Loth Lorien and sets out via river]
Saurman: "ph34r my army of uruk hai! Go outz0r, find teh hobbitz and pwnz0r them!"
uruk hai: "leet!"

[stopping at the banks of the river, the Fellowship sets up camp]
**Frodo goes off looking for firewood, Boromir follows and confronts him
Boromir: "Gimmie teh ringz0r so ** hax can fight teh boss!"
Frodo: "Sif, foo. Punkbuster will pwn joo!"
Boromir: "Naw, we play on non-pb servers"
Frodo: "STFU noob"
Frodo has left the server
Boromir: "***! FRODO! Bring teh ringz0r back, faghat!"

**A group of Uruk Hai encounter Boromir
Boromir: "OH FFS, TEAMS!!"
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Uruk Hai [arrow] Boromir
Boromir: "****ing campers"
**Aragorn comes across the battle
Aragorn: "Boromir joo noob! ***!"
Uruk Hai: "Hah, pwn!"
Aragorn [broadsword] Uruk Hai
Aragorn: "I bring joo teh pwn!"
**Aragorn goes to Boromir
Boromir: "Damn lag!"
Warning: Connection problems detected
Boromir has disconnected
Aragorn: "FFS!"

[Frodo returns to the bank of the river where he gets into a boat. Sam 'sees' him]
Sam: "Frodo! ***! Invisibility h4x!"
Frodo has connected to the server
Frodo: "Sam, STFU and FOAD!"
Sam: "Sif!"
Frodo: "Oh, ffs n00b!"

3Nd!!!!11

 

[Joker Boy]

Choose your favorite...

 

[Bryon]

I don't understand this.. What is it? Kind of seems like spamming to me.

 

[t2t2t]

Leet of rings!

 

[Joker Boy]

Its a leet of movies thing. I found the Leet of the Rings on google, my friend wrote the Chronicles of Teh Narnia one. Quite hilarious if u ask me! Muahahahaha!! So in a way, yes it is sort of spam. L33t 1s 4lw4yz sp4m!!! muahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

 

[Ginogunther]

I think there should be a Spam section

 

[t2t2t]

Its a leet of movies thing. I found the Leet of the Rings on google, my friend wrote the Chronicles of Teh Narnia one. Quite hilarious if u ask me! Muahahahaha!! So in a way, yes it is sort of spam. L33t 1s 4lw4yz sp4m!!! muahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Y 0 |2    |2 | 6 |-| "|"   8 |2 0 "|" |-| 3 |2