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You get grass clippings. I insert 'the herb'

Well... Someone who has licked the terminals of a battery and got 'stung'

Hmm...so the concept of "kill the above user" might have got a little side-tracked... I kill the above user with a banana to the eye, before the C4 explodes, then hastily defuse!

Granted, but only when you stop driving I wish for an interesting day tomorrow...

five tepid cups of coffee

2529 poledancers wrapped deliciously around said poles

you get a thousand eyes, a twisted tail and EPA (or IPA if you prefer) I insert an auspicious meerkat named Aleksandr

2524 inches of.... ...well, don't you have a dirty little mind!

lol! You get a headshot! I insert purple curtains

Nah, I'm not a ranter - there are enough without me! I guess someone who is in my socks...

(I'd choose three hairs...from my back!) Granted, but as you increase your irn bru intake, you get overhydrated and swell up like a balloon I wish for my shirts to be magically ironed

Damn, I can't even do one! But before I starved, I had the good sense to knock and bang on the cupboard, just at the moment krofunk had put his ear to the cupboard to see if he could hear something...the resulting sound caused a perforated eardrum, which bled non stop out of the ears (due to...

2522 is three-quarters two's

threeeeeeeeee

You get pulled in as well! I insert BBC Television Centre

Nope, blue all the way! I guess someone with an animated avatar

2517 speaker mounts

2513 comical deaths

granted, but there are more users who eat it all up. I wish for another three wishes

You get a hearing aid. I insert a sheet of glass