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You get the fountain of youth I insert a pirate

You get your ears boxed! I insert the 1924 Olympic Games

yeah you got me there. I guess someone who writes their post backwards

You get a rubber john. I insert a plastic carrier bag (non-recyclable)

Correct! yeah it's beautiful lol :P I guess somebody who has a beautiful body...;);)

you get a severed finger I insert a steel gauntlet

You get the monument to 1000 years of Russia, Velikiy Novgorod I insert Ivan the Terrible

2780 years of old age

You get trial by combat! I insert teeth

2776 tickets

You get an all expenses paid trip to Cornwall I insert a red admiral

2771 let's do this thang

You get a stack overflow. I insert a Mexican bean, which resembles the above Polish president's face

you get brokeback mountain on blu ray I insert a hairy bean

you get a spork I insert a camping gas cylinder

2764 - we're only talking about a million here...you'd probably have a good shot at it! After all, a million seconds is less than 12 days.

You get an untraceable bug (the c code was bound to be written in a clever but very confusing way with no comments) 10 PRINT "I insert some BASIC" 20 GOTO 10

2761 drunks fighting in Leicester Square...

You get 299 packs of bubblegum (the last one got stuck) I insert £150

2758 'because's