LHVWB
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There was once a magical apple, that glowed whenever you got near it. It shined in multiple colors, like a rainbow at the stormy beach of doom. It tasted like a really off tub of big moldy stew. This meant that the people of the apple had to buy a big, big, big enourmous mint to stop the apple being tasted. But the mint tasted like someone puked in your mouth. The taste was so damn disgusting that when someone ate it it caused white pustules to form in their brain, making them have brain farts and blackouts. Although the apple was a regular old piece of fruit, it had certain magical properites such as the ability to fly, and swear in 5000 different languages. But then one day a gnome decided hold a competition, and the prize was to have a taste of the apple, a bite as big as a house. Unfortunately the apple was smart, and started the process of turning itself into a banana, so the gnome wasn't able to find it, because gnomes can't see the colour yellow. However this banana wasn't quite ripe yet so it was actually green, and gnomes can see green, so the gnome cried out 'thats where that banana got to, when I was looking for it', he then grabbed the banana and used his magic to destroy all of the poor people who inhabited the island of Tasmania, fortunately not many people know where Tasmania is so