game: kill the above user

[zen-r]

But I had rubbed on some anti-bashing cream just before you got me, so I was resistant.

Then I put some really sharp paper in your origami stock, so that when you return to your hobby of origami, you get so many paper cuts that all the blood drains out of you.

 

[ichwar]

but because I never use origami stock, I survive.

I force you to use linux which so much baffles your brain that you die of confusion.

 

[zen-r]

But because I never use my brain, I survive.

I then put ichwar inside a giant sphere, & tell him to sit in the corner.

After 24 hours of puzzling, his head over-heats & melts down his shoulders.

 

[ichwar]

but I don't puzzle so I survive

I force you to solve a chess problem to save your life. You die of confusion because your brain can't handle it all.

 

[Twinkie]

But then I put my thinking cap on and live.

Then I mind control your penguin and make him fart on you until you suffocate.

 

[zen-r]

(I'm still alive from earlier, because I used a chess computer to solve ichwar's chess problem for me).

When the penguin is done killing ichwar, I then set the penguin on Twinkie so that he also suffocates. I watch on in amusement, whilst wearing fume resistant breathing apparatus.

 

[Twinkie]

But the breathing apparatus is only resistant and not fume proof. The fumes enter the mask while the wind blows the farts away from me, and you attached your mask on so tight that you die of methane poisoning.

 

[ichwar]

but there are hundreds of me because I have made hundreds of posts, and the rest of me come back and eat twinkie.

 

[alexandgruntz]

I simply nuke the hectares around ichwar and his clones, killing them all.

 

[zen-r]

But all the radioactive ichwar ash falls on you, & you mutate into a fly - which I swat.

 

[ichwar]

but since you're there to swat the fly, that means your close enough in proximity to the nuked area, so you just outright die. Then, since someone has to be alive, all of me come back to life.

 

[zen-r]

But I had my radiation suit on, so I didn't die.

And since I am alive, you didn't need to come back to life - so you don't!

 

[ichwar]

but I did anyways, and we take of your radiation suit so you die.

 

[zen-r]

But I had another one on beneath that, and anyway there is no more radiation left.

I then take you to a psychiatrist because you keep thinking there is more than one of you. He treats you & cures you of it, but while under hypnosis I sneak in & convince you that you're a bird. You try to fly off the Grand Canyon, but fall hundreds of metres to earth - SPLAT!

 

[ichwar]

but we (all of us 450+ ichwars) land in the water at the bottom. SPLASH! we survive because we can swim very well. We then come and murder you for lying to us.

 

[zen-r]

But you don't see me - you see yourself reflected in a mirror. So you murder yourself.

 

[ichwar]

but we just murder the mirror, then we see you hiding behind the mirror and we kill you.

 

[zen-r]

Which was another mirror, so you kill yourself.

 

[ichwar]

no, we just keep shattering mirrors until we finally see the real you and then we kill you.

 

[zen-r]

Which was another mirror, so you kill yourself.